God's in his heaven...

Our beautiful 2025 calendar arrived in the mail today! Up it went, since we don't need to be reminded of tomorrow's simple schedule.

Today I have been steeped in wrapping up business for the year and preparing for the next. Each year I make improvements to systems, but in the end there are always many snarls to be worked out. Sigh. 

"God's in His heaven- All's right with the world" (Robert Browning). On to a more restful evening.

Powers equal to your tasks

"Do not pray for tasks equal to your powers. Pray for powers equal to your tasks!"

- John Flynn -

missionary to the Australian Outback

Life is Uppermost

As I watch lemony yellow leaves flutter from our magnificent cottonwood tree while a light breeze shakes its aging leaves, words I seem to remember reading in the past float through my mind. "IN DEATH I LIVE." Was it a quote from Lilias Trotter? A remnant of the verse, "Now if we have died with Christ, we believe that we will also live with him" (Romans 6:8)? As I ponder these words, I think of the deaths I have experienced.

My life has seen its share of death. I have been by the blessed bedsides of dear family members as they were lifted out of their used-up bodies into the arms of Jesus. I count these experiences of watching a LIFE TRANSFORMED from a broken world into the awesome presence of our loving Creator as some of my most precious gifts.

Another kind of death I have experienced is the death of dreams. While painful at the time, these experiences too I count as gifts. As I have been compelled to give up personal plans for my life, I HAVE RECIEVED SOMETHING SO MUCH BETTER - the perfect will of God in my life. In the death of my plans, I have received the peace of knowing that the One who loves me beyond comprehension and knows what the future holds orders my days.

There is another death that has brought life that I have been blessed beyond blessed to experience. "Truly, truly, I say to you, unless a grain of wheat falls into the earth and dies, it remains alone; BUT IF IT DIES, IT BEARS MUCH FRUIT" (John 12:23, emphasis added). Just as Jesus died and rose again in order to raise many more to eternal life, so I too, because of His substitutionary death, have died and risen again in a spiritual sense. On the day many years ago that I repented of my sin (sin is the lasting death which brings no life in its wake) and accepted the love of God, Jesus raised my soul out of the groveling pit of sin to eternal life. The life I now have is fruitful as I surrender my faulty human will to His perfect will. Yes, it is a death of sorts to give up my own will. But just as the death of a flower is what leads to abundance of life through its seed or as the death of the leaves of my giant cottonwood provides life giving nutrients to future plants through their decomposition, so my surrendered life can now produce the fruit for which it was originally made. Praise God for this death to eternal death that leads to life, a life of fruitfulness and multiplication in the Kingdom of God! And this life isn't such a bad deal for me either. While I will experience pain and loss on earth, I know that these troubles are light and momentary in comparison with the eternal glory of heaven (see Romans 8:18).

In her book, Parables of the Cross, Lilias Trotter wrote these words beside her detailed painting of a bed of lush and colorful moss atop a decomposing mound of brown plant matter. "This bit of sphagnum shows the process in miniature: stage after stage of dying has been gone through, and each has been all the while crowned with life... YES, LIFE IS THE UPPERMOST, resurrection life, radiant and joyful and strong, for we represent down here Him who liveth and was dead and is alive for evermore" (Lilias Trotter, "Parables of the Cross", emphasis added).

 

Miracles Every Day

"'Your are asking for a miracle,' they said. But the creation of a flower is a miracle, and God makes new flowers every day. So that word [of skepticism] could not trouble us…"

- Amy Carmichael -

 P.S. Find this this original watercolor painting for sale here on my Etsy shop.

Our Greatest Asset

"The health of our bodies is our greatest asset. Because when that goes, what do you have?" I recently read this quote in a newspaper article by a well intended defender of our health. This wasn't my first time to hear the sentiment. I get it. Illness is an evil to be fought against. (More correctly, illness is the result of sin, and while it is good to fight against illness, evil is our true enemy. But that is another topic...) The side of me that recoils from pain, suffering, and all the unsightliness of a body that does not operate as it was designed understands what is being said. But as I have spent many (okay, all) of my adult years struggling with my health, I can't help but be rather indignant over this well meaning yet off base idea.

 

Firstly, the question is insulting. (Hang with me! I am not bitter over it.) Are those who do not have health second rate citizens? I believe this to be a thoughtless and unintended insult, and so will quickly pass it by.

 

Secondly, I don't believe that any human being - whether the tiniest of babies in their mother's womb, the child filled with delight and energy, the young adult full of aspiration, the hard working and faithful middle-aged, the bed ridden elderly, or the variously "disabled" - is at any time in their life free from carrying out their purpose in life. As a follower of Jesus, I believe that God gave deep purpose and meaning to every human life. "When I look at your heavens, the work of your fingers, the moon and the stars, which you have set in place, what is man that you are mindful of him, and the son of man that you care for him? Yet you have made him a little lower than the heavenly beings and crowned him with glory and honor" (Psalm 8:3-5). Simply being the bearer of God's image (Genesis 1:26) marks us with great worth and purpose.

 

Thirdly, I believe that suffering has a purpose. Take Lazarus for example. He was a man who suffered much in an illness - so much so that he died of it. Jesus' words about Lazarus' illness and death highlight the purpose in them:

 

"This illness… is for the glory of God, so that the Son of God may be glorified through it" (John 11:4).

 

"Lazarus has died, and for your sake I am glad that I was not there, so that you may believe" (John 11:14).

 

Lives were changed eternally for good because the deity, power, and life of Christ were made obvious through Lazarus. But in order to display all of this, Lazarus had to suffer and die. (Some may accuse Jesus of callously using Lazarus' suffering for His own purposes. Read the entire passage, and you will see that Jesus was cut to the heart by the death of his good friend. The same is true of our suffering, friends!)

 

Lastly, those who belong to the eternal Kingdom of God possess something extremely precious. Whether we have our health or not, we have Jesus! He is truly our "greatest asset."

 

And so, while the well meaning may be appalled at illness, I would say this. Illness does not impair a person's worth or work, nor does it take from the Christian their greatest treasure. "For I am sure that neither death nor life, nor angels nor rulers, nor things present nor things to come, nor powers, nor height nor depth, nor anything else in all creation, will be able to separate us from the love of God in Christ Jesus our Lord." (Romans 8:38-39).

Yet Not I

Challenged. That's how I feel when I attempt painting leaves. Yet I am determined to learn. And so I keep trying.

It seems as though leaves should be the easiest of subjects to paint. Their simplicity fools me into believing them within my skill level. And yet my hard efforts come up short. Perhaps I'm overthinking them. After all, my best paintings are not those that I labor over but those created in the moments I get lost in the beauty of my subject and the joy of pigment and water.

So it is in the life of many a Christ follower. We carefully think through whether we are able to do the task before us - forgiving a false accusation, returning evil with good, showing compassion, sharing the hope that is in us... The more we dig into ourselves for strength, the more we realize we are completely unable. But when we gaze at Jesus and "the immeasurable greatness of His power toward us who believe," the formerly impossible deed is effortless (Ephesians 1:19).

Yet not I, but Christ in me.

Blessing for Obedience

 

Look Forward

"By faith [Abraham] went to live in the land of promise, as in a foreign land, living in tents with Isaac and Jacob, heirs with him of the same promise. For he was looking forward to the city that has foundations, whose designer and builder is God" (Hebrews 11:9-10).

Illness clearly shows the flaws of our bodies. Rather than being a palace of luxury, our bodies display all the inconveniences and discomforts of a tent.

Even for one who likes a good tent camping vacation, the glamor and novelty will eventually wear off. Bones begin to ache from hard ground. Skin ages from exposure. Hair grows hopelessly tangled from wind. Face is scorched from cooking over a fire. We begin to dream of a luxury hotel.

Has the novelty of illness (or whatever your trial may be) worn off? If you (as I have done) focus on the discomfort, you will become disheartened. You will want to give up, and you will cry for an end to it. And while crying out to God in our pain is good, God wishes us to not only turn our hearts to understand our utter helplessness (What a gift to be given true vision!), but also to turn our eyes to hope in and expectancy of the promise. Eternal life. Life made beautiful through the Spirit now. Life more beautiful and grand than we are able to imagine in "the city that has foundations, whose designer and builder is God."

So in the trial, let's not only cry out, but lift our gaze to the One who has promised a home in His palace.

Photo: bricks torn out of our basement during professional mold remediation

Flowers of Quiet Happiness

"...but if the path set before her feet was to be narrow she knew that flowers of quiet happiness would bloom along it."

-Lucy Maud Montgomery, Anne of Green Gables -

...until it finds its rest...

"Thou has made us for Thyself, O Lord, and our heart is restless until it finds its rest in Thee."
- Augustine -

Peace for Bluster

"And he wrote letters to cast contempt on the Lord... And they shouted it with a loud voice in the language of Judah to the people of Jerusalem who were on the wall, to frighten and terrify them, in order that they might take the city."

- II Chronicles 32:17-18 -

The Enemy's tactics don't change.  Noise. Fear. Persistence. What is our defense against this bluster? Like Jesus, we must continually go to a quiet place to commune with the Father (see verse 20). In that place we can hear the voice of Truth, escape the persistent barrage of the Enemy, and leave our fears behind as we walk forward in confidence in the mighty and victorious God.

Photo: watercolor play from last winter

Joy

Lest I think the power of joy comes from within, the day of trial comes that I may learn that joy and every other good thing comes from above.

"Count it all joy, my brothers, when you meet trials of various kinds, for you know that the testing of your faith produces steadfastness... Do not be deceived, my beloved brothers. Every good gift and every perfect gift is from above, coming down from the Father of lights, with whom there is no variation or shadow due to change."

- James 1:2, 3, 16, 17 -

Fueling Up

This morning's fuel:

yellow squash

beet greens

onion

chicken

II Chronicles 20

"Do not be afraid and do not be dismayed at this great horde, for the battle is not yours but God's."

- II Chronicles 20:15 -

Know Truth. Live Truth. Speak Truth.

Another Sunday. Another headache and nausea. Another two watercolor paintings under my belt.

Life doesn't feel perfect. My paintings aren't perfect. But God's will for my life is perfect. 

"For I know the plans I have for you, declares the Lord, plans for welfare and not for evil, to give you a future and a hope."

- Jeremiah 29:11 -

Words

Words are powerful, and it is amazing how they can make or break a day. These last two days have been made lighter by sweet, humorous, and instructive words. Here are a few excerpts:
"We hope you and your family have lots of cheery - God blessed days."
- An 80-something year old relative whose days are marked by change and decay, yet through occasional letters to Mom she radiates the joy of of the Lord.

"I know so well that you did not do it. The people on the weather NEWS are talking about Elsa did bring a HUGE storm into a large area of the ocean and many areas of the U.S.A. But I know very well that it is just the weather that has struck all those areas and they're ALL under God's control, and you did not do such a thing.
So PLEASE don't cry....
Don't be sad...."
- A dear friend who has suffered more physically than any in my acquaintance, is my example in praising God always, is my constant prayer warrior, and has a wonderful sense of humor.

"For all things come from you, and of your own have we given you."
- I Chronicles 29:14 -

Truth and Beauty

As a week of treatment takes its toll on my body, soaking up beauty is vital for my soul. While my Sunday was mostly spent between bed and couch, I took an hour to attend virtual church and another to fill a page in my nature journal with one of my many favorite flowers. 

In the evening Hannah and I  decided to rewatch a movie we viewed during a long, monthly treatment last week. "Esther" by Sight & Sound Theatres combined truth and beauty in a way that was just what our souls needed. "Be still, and know that I am God" (Psalm 46:10).

Hope through me...

Hope through me, God of Hope,

Or never can I know 

Deep wells and living streams of hope,

And pools of overflow.

Flood me with hope today

For souls perverse, undone,

For sinful souls that turn away, 

Blind sunflowers from their sun.

O blessed Hope of God,
Flow through me patiently,
Until I hope for everyone
As Thou hast hoped for me.
- Amy Carmichael -

Photos from the backyard of our recent doctoring trip airbnb rental.

"...we return glory, honor, and praise, with all thankfulness..."

Thanksgiving looks different this year for many of us. For my family chronic illness continues to wage war in our bodies making for a very low key, small celebration. Yet our hearts are grateful.

As I glance over the history of the first four years at Plymouth, my trials seem small in comparison. I am not starving. I have not lost half my family members to illness. I do not face danger on every side. My clothes are not in rags. If they could praise God for His faithfulness, I most certainly can!

"...having these many signs of God's favor and acceptance, we thought it would be a great ingratitude if secretly we should content ourselves with private thanksgiving for that which by private prayer could not obtain [referring to a day of fasting and prayer for the necessary rain in a time of serious drought that the Pilgrims' crops needed to prevent complete starvation,  summer of 1623]. And therefore another solemn day was set apart and appointed for that end; wherein we returned glory, honor, and praise, with all thankfulness to our God who dealt so graciously with us."

- Edward Winslow -

A Blessed Thanksgiving to you!

P.S. I did not plan ahead with a photo for today, so here is one from my gallery archives. First brush drawing, April 2020.

Pain an Idol?

"Don't let your trial become an idol." That is roughly what Damaras Carbaugh said to me over the radio waves one day six years ago.* No, she didn't use my name. God added my name to Damaras' words as the impact of them settled into my mind. "Don't let your trial become an idol, Elsa."

An idol is something we revere. It is something that consumes our heart, mind and soul. It is something that takes precedence over all objects, events and relationships. It is something we take pride in.

How can something bad become a thing of pride to us? Watch a group of children showing off their badges of honor in the form of bumps and bruises, and you will see pride in something that originally was bad. We adults do the same thing in a more sophisticated way. Well, sometimes we are more sophisticated.

Pride in our trial breeds selfishness. A heart consumed with self has little room for others. Selfishness destroys relationships. We put ourselves before others, and we pull away from God who sees each person's pain with an equal measure of compassion.

"Don't let your trial become an idol, Elsa." I have heard this phrase now and again over the years. The warning has not come over the radio these times but rather from the small voice of my pricked conscience. I have put my trial higher than others’ trials. This has lead to strained relationships. I have let pain gain control of my thoughts. This has lead to distance from my Creator, Savior and Sustainer. Yes, a trial can become an idol.

Nevertheless, idols can be destroyed. Through repentance they can be thrown into the fire of mercy. Forgiveness can replace hurt. The Savior can take back His rightful throne and heal our sinful souls as, by His enabling grace we gaze on Him, not our trials.

*For the original quote and a good dose of godly exhortation that will stir your soul to action, listen to the Revive Our Hearts podcast titled "Walk with Me with Damaris Carbaugh," originally aired in May of 2014. This quote comes from the third part, "Goodbye to Me," but the whole series is well worth a listen.

The Best is Yet To Be

Listening in on one side of a telephone conversation, I heard Mom encouraging a friend with the words, "I have told you these things, so that in Me you may have peace. In this world you will have trouble. But take heart! I have overcome the world" (Jesus  speaking in John 16:33). In the next room I added my two cents to the conversation (quietly, to Hannah), "The best is yet to be!" Then I laughed. Boy, is that an understatement!

Pictured: sunset over the lake, summer 2020